Dealing with a divorce can cause a lot of pain and grief in your life. The legal procedures could be long and messy, with a lot of personal details brought out in court. This is why it is important to avoid some common mistakes in divorces that could impact your life in a significant manner.
There are a number of mistakes that are commonly made by people while going through a divorce. These are described in the following manner.
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1. Using the Kids as Pawns
No matter what the reason for divorce, you should keep your kids out of it. Making them take sides and bad-mouthing the other parent will only confuse your kids and complicate matters, especially those related to child custody and visitation rights. The kids should have a healthy relationship with both parents even after a divorce, and it is up to the courts to decide the issue of child custody. It is better to decide to cooperate in looking after the kids and working out a schedule to share time with them.
Always beware of getting advice from unauthorized sources regarding divorce settlements. What was good in one specific situation will not necessarily apply to others. It all depends on the assets and liabilities and the agreements between the parties as to how they should be divided. Looking at online sources and getting advice from friends and relatives who are well-meaning but do not have legal expertise could put you in more trouble regarding your divorce settlement,
3. Being Swayed by Emotions
We are all emotional creatures, and a divorce could stir up feelings of anger and the need to get out the most from the assets of your spouse or joint investments. You should not be swayed by emotions but make all decisions with a level head considering legal and tax implications. It is useless to get the house if you cannot make the mortgage payments.
4. Not Looking at Finances
Specialized Orange County divorce lawyers emphasize that the financial situation in a divorce is one of the first elements that needs to be looked at. If your spouse had control over the finances during your marriage, they might hide certain details from you or not give you a detailed picture of monthly and yearly expenditure. They may also hide details of investments and passwords to bank accounts. Hiring an experienced accountant will be the best way to get a detailed estimate of expenses and the income needed to meet them. They can help prepare a budget that will help you live within your means. You may have to look out for a job or additional ways to earn an income.
5. Not Getting Agreements in Writing
Do not make the mistake of having oral agreements with your spouse based on good faith and the earlier relationship that you had with each other. Life is not fair and they may be taking advantage of your trust. The courts would like to see written agreements duly signed and verified, rather than oral arrangements. Oral agreements may not be legally enforceable, even in the case of recorded statements.
6. Trying to Rush the Process
It is best to let the divorce proceedings take their time. Trying to expedite the process will often result in overlooking some important details, which could result in a loss to you. It is better to ask for mediation or settle the case out of court because filing a suit and going through hearings could result in a waste of time and increased legal bills.
7. Not Taking Care of Yourself
One of the aspects of divorce that is usually hidden is the emotional turmoil that it can cause. There can be feelings of guilt, shame or remorse over the event. You should make every effort to take care of your mental health by relaxing, socializing and finding new interests and hobbies. Joining support groups, getting the help of friends and relatives or even going to a therapist can help ease the mental pain of divorce.
8. Not Hiring a Divorce Lawyer
Most divorces are settled out of court. However, if there is no agreement on some issue and the matter has to go through a lawsuit, it will be advantageous to hire the services of an experienced divorce lawyer. They can help you file the necessary financial and legal documentation for your case and insist on all the details of your spouse’s documentation so that you can get a better picture of assets, liabilities, incomes and expenses.
While you may not be able to avoid the effects of a divorce, being aware of the mistakes that people commonly make will help you avoid the same in your case and make the settlement process easier for you.
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